What will she think of next.....

Well, today was one of those days I wanted to change my name from Mommy back to Melissa! The kids were on a mission to get at each other all day long!! They were at it from the time I was in the kitchen making breakfast until bedtime. We had several little "teaching moments" that went in one ear and out the other. Finally, in the evening, I told Kristina she could not go and play with a friend of hers because of the way she had been treating Jakob (she had been warned). We have had an issue with her pinching, and I am about to pull my hair out over it! I don't know how to get her to stop!!! Then, the great negotiator starts in...."I promise I won't pinch him the rest of the night!.......I promise I won't pinch Nathan (the friend she wanted to see." I told her that family is important and if she can't first learn to be kind to family, she will not be playing with anyone else. (I, of course, expect some fighting, and normal sibling stuff, but today was BAD, and she needs to be more respectful! The girl has attitude, that is for sure!) Anyway, she knew I wasn't going to budge, and so she finally stomped off to her room.

About ten minutes after her little march to her room, she came down telling me I better come look at something in her room. Well, the floor was wet by her door. She said it was just that way, and thought probably Jakob had had an accident. I felt his pants and he was still dry.....and had been almost all day. I told her it couldn't be that. Then I walked next to her bed, and it was wet. I asked her, "Kristina, did you spill some water, and that is why the floor is wet?" She said she did. I talked to her about lying and doing something and blaming her brother for it. I then realized it was wet in a couple of other places. My mouth dropped as the story came out. She had taken a cup of water and spilled a little water here and a little there to make it look like (so she thought) that Jakob had had an accident. I asked her if she had ever gotten in trouble for spilling something before. She said, "No." I said, "Well, why would you think you would have to cover up your spill? I would not get mad over an accident. You know that." She said, "well, I was just mad because I couldn't play with Nathan, and I wanted to get Jakob in trouble." I explained that she was in trouble for HER actions, and it had nothing to do with Jakob. (She had literally been picking on him just to pick at him. Jakob truly was innocent THIS TIME. She had pinched him when he was trying to dance......and she did it like three different times! It was after the third time, and after being talked to about it the other two times before, I took her privilege away.) Then my mind was kind of blank....I told her I appreciated that she told me the truth in the end, but that she would still need to be disciplined for what she did, but I was going to have to think about it first. I really wish she had been born with a user's manual! It seems that, she especially, catches me off guard, not knowing exactly what to say or do next. I try hard to make sure that when I discipline, it isn't out of anger or annoyance, but that whatever the consequences are, it has an affect on the heart issue. For example, I could take a privilege away or something, but if I do not teach her about lying in a way that makes her want to change (not just avoid punishment) then I haven't done her any good. Anyway, I guess I am just sorting things out and thinking out loud here.

On a good note, Jakob has chosen to finally take an interest in potty training!! FINALLY!!! He wanted a baseball outfit and a Hawkeye uniform. I told him only big boys can wear those things, and that we will have to wait until he is no longer having accidents or needing diapers. He went potty several times today without me even having to say anything to him! He had one very small accident early this morning, and he was very sad about it, (normally, he doesn't care if he has an accident.) and I told him that accidents happen and the important thing is that we keep trying. No more accidents after that. Now, perhaps you think I am bribing my child, but I like to look at it as encouragement with an incentive! =)